On Lily loves Lola Victoria did a blog post looking over the last 12 months. I want to do the same to remember the last year, or probably NOT remember the last year!! I'll try and include photos where possible :-)
It's a bit of a blur really, general winter blues wishing it'd be Spring. On a lot of strong pain killers, in a lot of pain, in and out of hospital waiting for my operation.
My birthday - another bad one! Seeing a guy who messed with my head AGAIN, when do I ever learn?! Went on a weekend away to London with him, rinsed lots of his money and finished with him as found out he had a long term girlfriend. Heather came to visit me from Bournemouth and cheered me up loads.
Really starting to pile on the lbs now. Almost 13 stone... Argghhh...
Spent wishing I was somewhere else, feeling pretty depressed and down in the dumps because of my tablets I'm taking. Wanting to take off somewhere hot. Waiting for something good to happen in my life.
Visited Heather in Bournemouth at her parents for a long weekend. Had a super time, especially in my hire car! Spent lots and lots of money, talking £600+ all on my credit card... Great. Balances getting higher and higher but don't care because I'm feeling so under the weather.
6th May had my operation, at last. Best thing I did. Was so ill afterwards though and in agony for 2 weeks afterwards due to a nasty infection. Dad later told me he'd never seen me looking so ill before and thought I was going to die!!!! Thanks Dad, can always count on you.
x1 of my 3 incisions :-(
Travelled to Corfu for a week, in great pain! Not sure how I managed it 10 days after op. Bit stupid of me but was all booked before got op date through. Looked like a huge elephant, or at least 5 months pregnant. Couldn't drink alcohol until the last day due to tablets, but think the holiday helped me recover - apart from my 2 panic attacks when I saw 2 accidents :-(
In Corfu - May 2009
Beginning of June, auditioned for Dating in the Dark! Unfortunately, I didn't get through. After seeing the programme, I'm glad I didn't!
Met Craig. Thought he was the best thing since sliced bread. Spent most of my evenings and weekends with him in June (and July). Cinema, eating out, cooking for each other, movies curled up on the sofa, complete laughs. Thought life was really turning round. Isn't it amazing how ONE person can make you feel this happy? Why can't you make yourself feel this happy? He was very caught up on his ex still though so didn't believe it would last.
Weight started to drop off May/June time, starting to loose 1/2lbs a week, a bit more per week to start with. Feeling so much happier with life.
Still doing crazy job searching. Desperate to try and find something.
Weekend away to Skegness ended in disaster! Brother being a total arse and needs to grow up, he's 15 now. Not 5.
Still continued to see Craig 3-4 times a week, can't stay away from him - this is good :-) Totally happy and content.
My lovely friend Ali found out she was pregnant again with her 2nd :-) Went to boots with her to get a test.
Moved into my new house, my daddy's house which me and Carlie rent from him. Really love it here, feels like home. Has done from day one. So glad I moved here.
Took another visit down to Bournemouth for a long weekend, weekend after Craig said he can't see me any more because his ex is pregnant (nothing happened between them while we were together). Gutted. Complete kick in the teeth when life could have been so good. Spent my days at work crying to Fran. I really thought he was the one. I'd never felt like this about someone before. I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him. Bournemouth was fab, and Heather looked after me so much. Didn't cry once and felt so proud of myself.
Same day I went to Bournemouth I went for an interview and got offered a new job at the NHS, fantastic! And £2k payrise, wooooo to me :-) Made my weekend and life seem so much better.
Everyone at my old job, including me were told we were being made redundant. So glad I'd just been offered another job, how crazy!!
My friend Amy gave birth to a gorgeous little girl, Mae Cale.
Started my dress making course. Very scared and nervous about going along because of all these other women there!! Not like me at all to be nervous, I'm usually quite outgoing and confident.
September was spent doing NOTHING in my old job, waiting to leave. Nothing exciting really happens.
Just one of those boring, nothing really happening months. Especially after a crazy pack August. Glad that things have calmed down.
Tenants told me they were moving out 15th November :-( Need to find a new tenant quickly. Completely in a panic, not sure what to do or who to turn to. Just cried to my parents! Thinking maybe have to hand keys back to mortgage provider. My poor little house. Would fuck my ex over though if I did that.
Car broke down and cost £300 - more money to pay out. So upset.
Started my new job on 5th October, best thing I ever did :-) Lovely people, lovely work, lovely office with sash window & huge desk.
Desk looking bare on 1st day!
My fab sash window at work
New tenant moved in and seems really nice.
New job going well, things looking up and getting back on track. Really happy and content with life, and not because anyone else is putting this smile on my face.
Spent a lot of time seeing friends and family. Especially Sam, Fran & Ali. Times are good. Really looking forward to Christmas for once. Life is really, really good. Not felt this happy for a long time.
In total I've now lost just under 2.5 stone. Life really is good isn't it?!
Went to London for a long weekend to see my aunt & uncle. Heather came up to stay with her sister too and we spent the whole day shopping, eating and drinking wine. Had a lovely time and great to see her again. She tells me one day she hopes I find my own Flo :-) Nicest thing anyone's said to me in a long time, really touched me and will never forget. Met my cousins newest addition to the family Amiya Brewer - my nan would be so proud :-)
Ate a dodgy KFC which made me really ill :-( Craig texted me in the evening wishing my happy Christmas, god. Feelings came rushing back to me quicker than you could imagine. I felt like I was falling in love with him all over again. In the back of my mind, I knew it wouldn't work out, he wasn't ready - not after 4 months. Christmas was horrible, constant checking of phone, waiting for him to say he can't meet me on 29th. Met him on 29th, still thought he was amazing, completely in awe of him. (2010 He later realises this but doesn't think he can give me back what I want and that I deserve a good man, and he's not that man. Hoping maybe one day he'll come back, 3rd time lucky. After long words with him I told him he needed to sort his life out. He's almost 30, not 18 anymore. He's going to become a very lonely old man. He took my words on board and I threatened to beat him with a stick if he dares texts me again - unless it's because he's decided he wants a relationship and for me and him to become something serious. I'm not getting messed about with this yes, no, yes, no, I don't know lark.)
Can't wait for the New Year to arrive, feel my life's been turned upside down again just when things were great and I was feeling so happy :-(
Things for 2010 are looking up. Glad to be back at work. Going to start to train soon for a 1/2 marathon. Feeling a lot better and back on track. Heading up again.
Hope you enjoyed reading :-)
I will insert photos tomorrow, but for now, I'm exhausted and off to bed.